So, we have some catching up to do. I think I'll start with how I got the job.
I had been hurting for a job for quite a while (3 years, in fact) and I ran into my friend while shopping with my mom at our local grocery store. I was shocked to see him, we hadn't talked in a long time and I didn't know he worked there. My mom interrupted us asking if they were hiring and he said "Actually yes, but you don't want to work here, it sucks," to which I naively replied, "It's better than not having a job, I can handle it." Two weeks later, I was in the office for an interview/instant hire. Two months later, I was wishing I could find ANY other job.
Right before I started actually working, I found out that the then girlfriend of a best friend of a very good friend of mine worked in the same grocery store's deli, a town away - in San Leandro. My deli is in Castro Valley. Then about 2 weeks after I started working, another one of my very good friends came back from college for the summer and started working in yet another of the same grocery store's deli a few more towns away, in Livermore.
You may have noticed by now that I haven't mentioned the name of my employing company. I'd like to keep myself somewhat protected, as horrid as my job is, I don't have another one and college, even community college, is expensive. We will call my company, "Slave(Life)Away." Also, there are stories about people I want to include, but I want to protect them as well. The character list is as follows.
Deli Girl: Me, you'll get to know me pretty well.
New Boyfriend: Used to work at a different grocery chain in the same department, helps me through the day with things like texts saying "Dominate that deli! ;) <3" (There is also Old Boyfriend, but he's not important enough to have his name boldfaced and with a description.)
Techie-kins: My friend who came back from college and only has a 3 or 4 month deli sentence. Told me the tech code to destroy our new scales...14632 what? ;) (For those of you who know where I work and have the displeasure of working there too, perhaps at a different location, this is my gift to you. If you get caught, you can always cover by saying you were trying to remember the code for Alpine Lace Swiss, or Deli Counter Bologna. As soon as you unplug the machine it goes back to normal. Use wisely.)
Nayrx: My friend who got me my job...fucking bastard...<3
Little Mama: The shorter of the Mamas. Youthful personality, even though she is a mother of two. Really fun to work with.
Apples: We play fight a lot, he walks me to take out the trash at night or when I go to my car after work in the dark. What department does Apples work in? That's right. Dairy.
Deli Bitch: He is in Satan's doghouse, he missed a secret shopper grading him, which means Satan's bonus isn't as big at the end of the year. Normally he works for the Starbucks kiosk, but he became the deli's bitch when he got only 24 hours a week and had to wash dishes for a couple of weeks after closing. I also had him walking me to the trash and my car at night.
Virginia: His neighbor is the store manager's drug dealer. He heard me say "chode" to describe a loaf of bread in the sandwich bar once and asked if it was the same meaning in CA as where he was from. Yup. Same urbandictionary.com definition.
Rock Girl: Quit soon after I was hired, but since she is such an epic person we keep in contact.
Ling Ling the Panda: The other is Leo the angry azn, but Ling Ling is great! Always has random supplies stashed away if I need them.
Big Mama: The taller of the Mamas, sadly it's because she doesn't want to be in management that the Critter is in office. Seems to have overcome a lot of hardships - good person, annoying voice.
The Slug: Seems to like me, seems concerned with the well-being of other employees. Reminds me of the Nurse in the Leonardo + Clair version of Romeo and Juliet, when Juliet is trying to get her to tell her if Romeo wants to marry her and the Nurse says
"Lord, how my head aches! what a head have I! O, my
back! Other' other side,--O, my back."Get the movie, watch the scene, and that's The Slug, all the time.The Pessimist: Somehow, whenever she starts talking about all of these horrible things, like cancer, Rock Girl and I can't keep ourselves from laughing. Nice, good person though.
Grandma: Acts like a mom, really concerned, but is a grandmother, literally and physically.
The Hun: Older Asian woman who is always grouchy.
The Critter: The pseudo assistant manager of our deli, no one seems to be able to remember her name for the first month they work there. It's inexplicable, but everyone hates her innately, so it could have something to do with that. She gets overwhelmed way too easily and can't actually run the deli to save her life.
Boss Lady: Our deli manager. Mixed feelings on this one, she's scary good at acting like she's not pissed at you even when she is. Kind of difficult to do my job when she won't correct me on anything or communicate about what she's mad about. Was gone the first 2 months of my career at SlaveAway.
Big G: One of the assistant managers of the store. She's hardcore gangsta.
Satan: The store manager. The union has been trying to fire him for years.
You'll hear stories that make you laugh, cry, and want to send me money ;) (That last one was a joke, but really...they're only paying me $8.75/hour...I wouldn't turn down ANY charitable donations.) At least, that was my reaction to these stories as they were happening.
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